Passive, aggressive or assertive personality

Confidence and self-esteem are two integral components of our growth, and it’s important that we develop these early on in order for us to be able to pursue our respective passions and interests and grow as individuals. Alongside confidence and self-esteem is assertion, or the capacity of an individual to defend and affirm his feelings, opinions, and thoughts to other people. You can slowly develop this trait and leverage on this, as this can help them be firmer with your convictions and principles in life. 

Unfortunately, there are instances where the line between assertiveness and aggression can get hazy, and what should be a trait that could help you develop can actually be a tool that can harm you. How can you tell if your assertion is becoming aggression, and how do you deal with this? What if it’s the other way around and you aren’t being assertive enough? 

By the end of this module, you will be able to:

  • Understand what being assertive means
  • Determine how you currently see yourself
  • Determine your dominant trait – passive, aggressive or assertive?
  • Understand the differences between each trait
  • Have personalised goals on how to develop your assertiveness skills

Assertive Interaction

Assertiveness can help you express yourself effectively and stand up for your point of view, while also respecting the rights and beliefs of others. Being assertive can boost your self-esteem and earn others’ respect. Learn how to recognise how you behave when others behaviour towards you is negative. Learn what to say and how to say it. Learn the art of saying NO!

By the end of this module, you will be able to:

  • Acknowledge that you can’t control other people’s behaviour
  • Focusing on what to say and how to say it: Using the LADDER technique when dealing with others behaviour
  • Say ‘NO’!

Benefits and Obstacles of being Assertive

Knowing how you can personally benefit from being assertive helps you know when and how to be assertive. There may be times where you find that you aren’t assertive – find out when those times are and what is stopping you so that you can communicate your wants and needs more effectively. Overcome your personal obstacles and succeed in being assertive.

By the end of this module, you will be able to:

  • Understand how being assertive benefits you personally
  • Recognising what possible obstacles are stopping you from being assertive
  • Recognise in which situations you might need to work on being more assertive
  • Recognise how to communicate your needs and wants 

Assertive Communication

Assertiveness means expressing your point of view in a way that is clear and direct, while still respecting others. Communicating in an assertive manner can help you to:

  • minimise conflict
  • control anger
  • have your needs better met
  • have more positive relationships with friends, family and others.

Assertiveness is a style of communication which many people struggle to put into practice, often because of confusion around exactly what it means. 

By the end of this module, you will be able to:

  • Express empathy in a supportive manner.
  • Escalate a situation in an assertive manner.
  • Effectively ask for more time in an assertive manner.
  • Avoid ‘sugar-coating’ your message.
  • Express what you want to communicate and achieve in a more effective manner.